


Sharks and Senju

by strippinfor_eren



Category: Naruto
Genre: Bad Pick-Up Lines, F/M, Flustered Tobirama, Humor, M/M, When I say bad I mean BAD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-01-05 14:38:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12191847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strippinfor_eren/pseuds/strippinfor_eren
Summary: Hashirama needs some pick-up lines. He thinks he’s found the right one now.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I know I should be working on my story and not this, but it’s been in my notes for so long. It’s really short, but I laughed the whole time I wrote it. Enjoy!

"Okay, okay, how about this one?" Madara asked and cleared his throat, looking down before slowly looking back up at Tobirama. "Are you a shark? 'Cause I've got some swimmers you can swallow."

Hashirama died, clutching his stomach as he laughed and fell from the coffee table to the floor. Tobirama gaped. After so many awful one liners from his older brother, and some even worse ones from Madara, he'd never expected _that_ from the Uchiha.

"Oh, oh my god!" Hashirama called, pointing at his little brothers face. While it was usually stoic and bare of emotion, at that time a faint blush had worked it's way onto his face. It made Madara begin to laugh harder.

"Enough!"

"Oh, is little Tobi mad? Should we be scared?" Hashirama teased, more or less wheezing. Tobirama stood at that, hands under the table that Madara was sitting on. As he rose, the table flipped, making Madara topple off and straight onto Hashirama who gasped. He swiftly left the room, flipping his brother and Madara off. That was the last time he was going to listen to a suggestion from Madara.

-

_“Hey. Tobirama,” the Uchiha called for him._

_Tobirama sighed, setting down the papers he was looking over (for his brother) beside him on the couch. “Yes?”_

_“You’re big brother here has a crush on that Uzumaki. We wanted to test some pickup lines on you to see what would work on her.” Tobirama turned to look at his brother, raising a brow to question him._

_Hashirama flushed slightly, mumbling his disagreement. He figured he may as well humor them. He hated pick-up lines anyways._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Madara has apologized. Doesn’t mean it helped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas guys! I know I said I wouldn’t write another chapter but I figured it’s Christmas and stuff. So here it is; short and sweet.

Tobirama hummed as he cooked himself dinner, nodding his head softly to the beat.

After the display earlier, Tobirama was certainly _not_ going to cook for his boyfriend nor his brother, who happened to be staying the night.

While he was stirring, he suddenly felt hands around his waist and warmth against his back as Madara leaned his head on his shoulder. “Baby, I don’t know what else to say. I’ve apologized, I even tried to cook for you! And I don’t even know how!”

Tobirama ignored him, turning the stove off and pulling a bowl down from the cabinet above. Madara pouted, then smirked. He turned his head, mouthing at Tobirama’s neck. “Babe,” he mumbled against his neck. He felt the body tense in his arms, hearing the bowl clatter to the counter.

“Tobi? Something wrong?” Madara asked cheekily.

Tobirama huffed, spinning in his boyfriends hold and knocking him on the side of the head only half heartedly. “You oaf. Do you know how stupid you are? That pick-up line was awful, and I’m not sure where you heard it but I found that rude and inappropriate.”

Madara removed one hand to rub the back of his hair, laughing sheepishly. “Sorry, sorry. I thought it’d be funny.”

Tobirama rolled his eyes, pushing Madara’s hand away and putting his food in the bowl. “Mhm. And you know what else is funny? You’re on the couch tonight. No if’s, but’s, and’s, or or’s.”

“Fair.” Madara nodded his head, backing to lean against the counter. His eyes widened as he processed the words. “ _Wait what_!?”

**Author's Note:**

> Madara and Tobirama are in a relationship for this. If they weren’t this probably would’ve ended worse.


End file.
